Friday, November 19, 2010

Who is REALLY the Sexiest Man Alive...?

Cuz it sure ain't Ryan Reynolds. Don't get me wrong, the guy is hot (I remember the scene from "The Proposal", when he just came back from exercising, and he took off his shirt..........yes Lawd, he is blessssed), but there are sexier guys in this world. And here are my choices (in no particular order)
*side note: they are not all actors...I'm trying to understand how People magazine makes their choices. You said Sexiest MAN Alive, not Sexiest ACTOR Alive...get it right dammit**:
1. Guchi Onyewu
I mean, just look at that. This dude embodies sexy - inside and out. He is so down-to-earth, funny, God-fearing guy, and just why isn't he on the list???? If you think this picture is fire, wait until you see him in person....and I am almost afraid to think that he doesn't know he is THAT fine.

2. Denzel Washington

Why did this man only make the list once??? And Brad Pitt was on the damn list like twice or 3 times. I mean, this is DENZEL...if I had my way - in another world - he would be the father of my babies! Does anyone not understand this? This man has not made ONE bad movie. He's funny, a great family man, and an AMAZING actor (if you haven't seen "Training Day", slap yourself, over and over again).

3. Eric Dane
I get soooo happy when I watch McSteamy on Grey's Anatomy EVERY Thursday. Last night's episode when he went to get water to drink and he was shirtless....that scene did some things to me...things that I cannot write down on my blog...but this man is just hot. Another great actor, and from interviews, he seems like a cool down-to-earth guy. Damn you, Rebecca Gayheart...DAMN YOU!
Now out of these 3, People couldn't pick any?! I mean, Ryan Reynolds though? Then there's Common, American President Barack Obama (y'all cannot say that this man does not possess some type of...I hate this word, and I cringe as I type it...swag, especially when he's with his wife and kids...nothing like a good father and husband, and he's running a country...power in a man, when used right, is sexy as a mug), contender Patrick Dempsey (he truly is McDreamy), etc.
So, fellow readers, who do you think should have been the Sexiest Man Alive? And if you think they made the right choice with Ryan Reynolds, why?
Talk to me.

These Are My Confessions....

Now this gon' be the hardest thing I think I ever had to do (not really), got me talkin' to myself askin' how I'm gon' tell you...

I'm sitting at work, and instead of me to be doing some spreadsheet they want me to do (they will be VERY alright), I have decided to write a post about very random things about myself. I got this idea from one of my favorite bloggers VSB, and decided to start mine.

**Oh yeah, I know I haven't been blogging much, but trust me, this school/work thing ain't for's a grown a$$ person's world out here mayne...I will try my best to blog more...I say this all the time, I know, and I mean it**

Here goes:

1. One of my biggest fears is that I will be fat. Not like extra curvy, but like morbidly obese. This makes me shallow, and surprisingly evil, but it scares me. If I weigh more than 175lbs (and this is after I have kids), I think someone will have to take me to Fat Camp, or y'all might as well kill me.

2. I can't match my clothes. Like I have to wear at least 5 colors at a time.....AND, I still look put together..that's cuz I got it like that (3 snaps for the kid)...right now, I am wearing grey skinny jeans, a black and grey striped shirt, a brown and gold pashmina scarf, with purple smokey eyes, and I STILL look good. So when I see Nigerians at a wedding wear yellow lace, with yellow shoes, yellow bag, and yellow gele, I want to cry. That will DEFINITELY not be the case at my wedding.

3. I love to dance. Not like "go to a club and get my groove on" dance, but like "let's make up a dance routine" dance. I can watch a music video like 5 times, and then do the routine.

4. Another one of my fears is that I will die and go to some miserable place. I know I am not the best Christian in the world, but I am trying so very hard, cuz I don't want to end up in some dingy place while all my friends are partyin' it up in a place made out of gold and drinkin pimp juice out of gold pimp cups. Does that even sound right? No?

5. My mother and my brother are who I live for. That is all.

6. I am all for making Nigeria a better place, but living there? No thank you. So how I will help make Nigeria a better place from where I am is still a mystery to me.

7. This will contradict #6, but I am a PROUD Nigerian.

8. I HATE shopping. Omg!!! I can't stand malls. How people can walk from one store to another baffles me. You walk around looking at clothes, only to come out 2 hours later with NOTHING...lemme find a friend take me out, and she don't get nothin'...I will cut a.......*sigh*....Anyway, I do all my shopping online. Luckily I know my body well enough to know what fits me, and if it don't fit (which is rare), I return it for FREE.

9. The way I love to eat, even my boyfriend worries about me. I can eat breakfast, brunch, lunch, evening snack, dinner, and STILL be hungry for a midnight snack. Where it goes, I don't know. Thank God I love to workout, otherwise I would be on the fast track to Fat Camp by now.

10. My left hand is completely useless. Like I can't catch, snap...I can't do ANYTHING with it. I think it is just there so I can look like a normal human being.

That's all I can think of. Oh ye friends, what are some random things about you? C'mon, talk to me.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

"Born To Run"

Today is my father's 24th anniversary.

Twenty-four years ago, the man I called "Daddy" was killed by a letter bomb. How heartless can someone be? We will get to that later.

Pulitzer-Prize winning journalist Dele Olojede wrote a book about my father. "Born to Run - The Story of Dele Giwa" was written in 1987 and it gives details about him that I never knew about. I read about what he went through growing up, and how he got to be one of the most famous men in Nigeria.

The book was very interesting to read. I loved how the writers made you feel like you were part of the events. The conversations my father had with his best friends, with the ladies (did not know he was suave like - especially my mother, and with political leaders.

It's funny to see how he was friends with IBB (he was president at the time, and suspected of killing my father), but when the "truth"got out, IBB turned on him. Too much power is not good for anyone.

I was one year old on October 19, 1986, but I don't remember anything. All I know are the stories my mother and everyone else tells me, the pictures that she gave me, and from the book. I strongly believe that I am alive for a reason. I could have been in the study with him and his friend.

God has a plan for everyone. I believe the only reason he died that day was because his purpose had been fulfilled: he left behind five beautiful children, a magazine that did VERY well, and a legacy that NO ONE can touch. To think that this happened twenty-four years ago, and looking at the condition Nigeria is in, I really don't see a difference.

Here is an example:
I read about Cecilia Ibru, the former managing director and CEO of Oceanic International Bank Plc, and how she was arrested for so many crimes, that if I start, I won't stop. She gets six months. SIX MONTHS. There is something very wrong with this. We all know that she will not stay there six months, because she will get out in four due to "good behavior", or a "deteriorating health condition". Bernie Madoff got 150 years. That is just wrong.

And the fact that IBB is running for President in 2012................................................................................I'll leave it at that.

How do you kill someone??? With a letter bomb?? WHY? HOW do you sleep well at night, knowing that you were involved in murder? Call me naive, but maybe I just have a conscience and I have the Holy Spirit dwelling in me, because it really blows my mind the way people think sometimes.

When my father's case went to court, IBB refused to testify. How does that work? Shows that Nigeria has a LONG way to go. All we can do is pray. Pray that justice is done. Pray that Nigeria becomes a better country. Pray that all the wrong people in power will one day pay for every single thing that they have done. Pray that God has mercy on us as a country, because we have SO much potential.

Daddy, I wish I had the chance to meet you and get to know you, because knowing the respect and love people still have for you after 24 years is amazing. I hope you are proud of your children and what we have become and I hope that you are having a great time in Heaven with God because I know that is where you are. Also, I just wanted to say that it's not over. The people who did this WILL suffer, and your death will not be in vain. Continue resting in peace Daddy, and I love you.

Sumonu Oladele "Baines" Giwa
(March 16, 1947 - October 19, 1986)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

"another a$$ pic?" "no, that's my stomach"

That's what my friend said to me when he saw my BBM picture. And that did something to me. Although he didn't mean what he said, it made me think twice about my gymming, or lack thereof.

Ever since the surgery, I have been so lazy with my workout regime. My two-a-days have become three times a week. I love the treadmill, but I need motivation. I see gorgeous Naomi Campbell, stunning Selita Ebanks, beautiful Gisele (who has a child by the way, and she still looks like that), or even Ms. Halle Berry (by the way, apparently some of these women have never stepped foot in the gym) and I think "what if?" what if I push myself, will I lose the 15 lbs I have been tryin to lose since April? What if I just stop working out, what would happen? Ok, that's a stupid question. But still...........

In my family, all the women are full-figured. They are real African women - the hips, the butt....and as sexy as that sounds, when they are in excess, it's not as sexy. I love the women in my family, but I don't want to reach that point. I CAN'T reach that point. Even if it means working out for the rest of my life. Now to find different types of exercise, because I gotta stay lookin' good. 

Now a lot of y'all might think I'm insecure (I'm not), and I shouldn't worry about it (I should), and I look good (I know). But I have to be careful, otherwise I will have the hips and ass - in excess.

I love my curves, I know that I will NEVER be stick thin. This a$$ is not going anywhere, that's for damn sure.

Monday, September 13, 2010

VMA Madness

Hello all!
It has been a while, I know. I was busy with school, two internships, moving....a whoooole bunch of stuff. But now, I can semi-breathe and talk to y'all.

So like, y'all know, the 2010 VMAs were yesterday. Personally, I was ready for some crazy stuff, but the whole thing just left me so *blah*. So let me get into what I liked, and didn't like, and what I thought was just plain random:

-Nicki Minaj, PLEASE what in the name of ass injecting, Bjork pink hair, stupid ASS song hell were you doing at the pre-show? First of all, I didn't understand what she was talking about (I don't think I ever will), and then you bring Will-I'm-Not on the stage....looking like he spent 12980983474598739873475353 days on the beach...homie was BLUCK, not blAck, BLUCK...I think he's talented, but that short, that just left me with a -_- face.

-Chelsea Handler, I was expecting so much more from you!! I think Ellen Degeneres' ONE joke when she presented "Best Female Video" was better than her hosting. Come to think of it, why didn't they pick Ellen? She had some funny parts (tryna remember some, and it's JUST not coming to me). It's cool that it was the first time in 16 years that they had a woman host the show, but I'm sure even Sarah Silverman could have done a better job......and she's not funny.

-The stage setup this year was CRAZY...

-Were we supposed to be surprised that Rihanna performed? I wasn't. What was she wearing? She needs more people. And Jesus.

-Jersey Shore...the fact that MTV has blown these 8 trashy, overtanned NFA (no future ambition) lamos to epic proportions still boggles my mind. Yes, I do watch Jersey Shore, cuz it just makes me feel better that these 8 trashy, overtanned NFA lamos exist, and I know that I am destined for much better things in life.

-I liked B.o.B's performance. Nothing to write home about, but it was aite.

-Lady Gaga...Lady Gaga...Lady many times did I call your name? The VMAs might as well have been the "2010 Lady Gaga VMAs". Did she not win like every category except Best New Artist (and that was because she wasn't on the list...)???? And she wore MEAT. I think I'm going to become a vegetarian.

On second thought, no one will make me turn away from my steak, chicken, or fish. Sorry.

-And finally, the reason why everyone watched the show: Kanye West. His performance left me speechless, and I'm still trying to figure out if that's a good thing or a bad thing. The ballerinas were just there to occupy space. His song was funny. The guy from the Clipse was still trying to prove to everyone that he is still relevant.

I think that's all I have about this year's show. All in all, I would give it a 6. Not bad, not good. Just there.
Readers, what were YOUR favorite and not-so-favorite moments?
I will be blogging more often. I know I say that a lot, but I have 3 weeks of doing nothing, so you will hear from me a lot more.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

What's Goin' On?!

Hey people,

A lot has been going on...I started summer school, I got back on my #exercisefreak tip (I am SO happy about that), and other things I do not wish to put on blast on the Internet.

But outside of my own lil' unimportant life, the most random things have been happening/have happened:

The World Cup is over!!! Now what am I going to do? It was fun for that month watching all the matches, and screaming at the TV with my bro and boyfriend. One second, they are just dribbling around and the ref is making stupid calls (That referee from Mali.............................enough said); the next second, two goals have been scored. I am going to miss all that. Something needs to be done. Maybe I need to start getting hype about Manchester United again....*drums fingers on table*

Lebron James is now on the Miami Heat. Personally, I really didn't care. But it was amazing just watching the whole world hold their breath on who Lebron was going to choose. Homie even had an HOUR on ESPN to talk about his decision. Shoot, I need to be famous so that the whole world can stop because of ME. Even Dan Gilbert was mad as all hell...people need to calm down. You should be happy for the guy. You were clearly looking out for's okay Dan.

...and while this was going on...

Oscar Grant's killer is guilty for only involuntary manslaughter. After watching the video, I didn't know what to say. Screw procedure. Homie did not have a gun. Johannes Mersehle, you killed someone. That's someone's child. An apology will not bring him back. The jury found Johannes Mehserle guilty of involuntary manslaughter, and not guilty of both the second-degree murder and voluntary manslaughter charges. From Sean Bell to this, when will it stop?

...and still going on...

BP needs to step their game up.

Christina Milian and The-Dream separated.
First Halle Berry, then Christina Milian...ummm, is there any hope for us women? I mean, money and talent can make ANY man hot and can take him places. But a woman's looks can only go so far. If you don't have the brains to go with it, the man will find it somewhere else...all about the whole package.

...and then the most random thing...

A "picture" of Nigerian artist Wande Coal leaked out. It was so bad to the point that he was #1 trending topic on Twitter. I had to ask my boyfriend if he died, because I don't understand why a picture that may not be him was such a big deal. Whoever the chick is, go to school, get a job, in fact, GET A LIFE. That's all. And Wande Coal, if that IS you, it's not by force to sleep with all your groupies...smh. Girls are crazy. Rub them the wrong way, and you just may see a naked picture of yourself online.

As you can see, so much important and unimportant stuff has happened. I promise to blog more often.


Friday, June 25, 2010

Rape-aXe: anti-Rape or pro-Murder?

When you look at that, what do you see? I see torture. I see one BIG mistake. Don't get me wrong, rape is WRONG WRONG WRONG, but if this is the way to catch the perp, are only pushing the man to kill the woman.

And clearly, this is only for male rapists. There ARE female rapists out there, but I guess for Sonnette Ehlers, she is protecting the women in South Africa - where this was created.

This is Rape-aXe, an anti-rape condom worn by a woman like it is a tampon. If she is attacked and the perp is trying to escape, the razor sharp barbs will attach to the penis, making it extremely painful for the perp. He will not be able to walk or pee, and it has to be surgically removed by a doctor.

So much sounds so wrong there.

1) Razor sharp barbs????!
2) Surgically removed by the doctor????!
3) Razor sharp barbs?????!

I don't even have a penis, and all I can say is OUCH!!! So this doesn't even PREVENT rape, it just stops it from the guy doing it a second time. They were handing this thing out during a World Cup match y'all!!! I don't know what I would do if I saw it. The woman can't even remove it herself, she has to go to a doctor. But wait...a woman puts it on, walking around with this thing. I mean, where is she going to go get raped? I know NO ONE asks to get hurt (unless you stupid), but it's like wearing Rape-aXe you are daring someone to hurt you. Like whaaa....? I don't even know what to say about this anymore.

On the website's Q&A section (her responses stay crackin' me up..."He will have some explaining to do to his wife or girlfriend how he encountered those scars"...LMAO), someone pointed out that HIV/AIDS could spread, and Ehlers said that the sheath of the condom protects any leakage into the woman. First of all, call me ignorant, or just plain stubborn, but I refuse to believe that. Are you serious??? Should the woman worry about AIDS when she's probably gonna be dead after the guy has killed her?!

I'm still trying to get past the razor sharp barbs.

I know some people will have some things to say about this new contraption. So comment.

Oh and if you like, check out the Rape-aXe website.


Monday, June 14, 2010

The Other (Wo)man

I know it has been a while since I blogged. I have been a busy bee with school. And now that it is over (got my A!!), I am gonna be all over this blog like white on rice. There's quite a bit to talk about, so bear with me as you see a plethora of topics.

Going back to something I blogged about a while back, I have decided to continue on that subject. When the husband cheats on the wife who has decided to stay with him, the woman he is cheating with is what we black folk call a "home wrecker". Don't get me wrong, this word is unisex, because women cheat too. But I will be speaking from a female point of view. This "home wrecker"...well...wrecks homes. She comes into a "happy" home, and starts sleeping with the husband. As time goes on, the husband starts to come home late, pick unnecessary fights with his wife, and just generally abandons his family. The home wrecker has taken the wife's place.

But does the woman not realize that it will happen to her? I mean, what made her think she was special? If they were meant to be together, I'm sorry, but he would have been with her in the first place. Now, men don't even wait for their divorces to be final before they are seen with other women. Homegirl can't even wait.

This has been happening for years, but no one has been talking about it. A spouse cheats, and people look the other way (like my mother's generation). And then we have the celebrities who feel like because they have money, all sense of morality is gone. From Gabrielle Union (never liked the chick anyway) to our favorite "Superwoman" Alicia Keys (my respect for her has gone from up there to negative infinity), these women think that it's okay. Dang, wait for the divorce to be final!!! Sheesh...fair enough, it looks like Dwyane Wade's ex-wife is on some other crazy ish, but still don't make it right for Gabby to just screw someone else's man. Alicia on the other hand....girrrrrl, for that child's sake, I hope you are the last baby mama/wife. Cuz poor baby got three other half- brothers and sisters, and 3's a crowd, don't you think?

I have been the home wrecker before. Back in my naive days. When I had no care in the world but my own. I was dating a guy who had a girlfriend, and after some time, he left her for me. I was so happy because I felt so special. Here I was thinking that we would be together forever. A few months later, he meets someone else, and I was left alone. I tell ya, Karma didn't have mercy on me. That b*tch bit me HARD in my toosh. And it hurt. So anyone who decides to take upon that role of "home wrecker", beware, it may feel and look all good and sweet in the beginning, but it never ends well. You may end up with the man, but trust you are not special. He will do it again. And trust me, I have no bit of bitterness. It's just the truf.

What say ye, readers? Please comment.


Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Is It Your Body...?

People who know me, know that I am OBSESSED with the gym...they know that I love the treadmill, and I will do boot camp classes everyday if I had the money (I can't wait to be rich, first thing I pay for is a year-long gym membership...packed with different classes to take..I canNOT wait!!)

Anyway, I digress. I went to dinner with a couple of friends, and they were telling me how good I looked, that I had put on weight, and I looked "healthy". Anyone who is conscious about the way they look know that "healthy" is just a nice way of saying "fat". I got curves now, I'm 5'10, and I don't look fat. In fact, I am not fat. Fair enough, when they saw me a couple of months back at a restaurant, my cheekbones were protruding like I hadn't eaten in days (I had just eaten before going to the restaurant! Yes, I love food..and what?!)

After they said that (we were at Nando's, I got two pieces of chicken, fried rice AND mashed potatoes), I started to think about my goals health-wise. What did I want to look like? How much do I want to lose? etc. blah blah. yaddi yaddi yadda.

Fair enough, the surgery really set me back about 15 pounds. I couldn't work out for a MONTH, and all I did in that month was eat like I was going to prison for life and I was never going to see good food again (random comparison, but hey, you get the point). Now that I am working out, I am really trying to get back into the swing of things. I used to go to boot camp sessions, I think I am going to start that again, because I do not like the way I look. I want to lose 10 pounds (AND KEEP IT OFF), I want those nice abs I had before. I want my thighs to shrink a couple inches. The body I have now is the body I want after I have kids. I have no children, I should not be looking like this. Call me crazy, but I am not. I am not anorexic. I KNOW I am not bulimic, don't believe in that crap. Those girls are crazy. I still love to eat, but I also love to work out. I just need to work out more. But I can't push myself just yet. Hopefully in the next month or so, I have stepped my gym game up and I am back to how I used to look.

Let's look at Naomi Campbell. Imagine if she put on about 30 pounds. She wouldn't look nice. And if you look at Crystal Renn (who used to be skinny, but is now a plus-size model), she didn't look nice when she was skinny, but she is STUNNING and "healthy" now. So it depends on the person, and what they are comfortable in. I know I will be comfortable in a 155-160 pound body.

See that picture of Naomi Campbell? Add about 12 pounds, and that's what I want. I will get there. Watch me.

Okay, going back to this paper. Hope you guys are well. How I miss blogging. Will get back to it in 3 weeks. Hopefully, I am inspired to blog.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

To Be or Not To Be?

That REALLY is the question.

Right now, I am in a loving and very fulfilling relationship, which makes me very happy. As time goes on, I am learning that happiness is very important, no matter what.

From past experiences, I have also learnt not to settle. You will not catch me settling for some guy because he has money, or because he is cute. Everyone is different, but this is MY blog, so I say how I feel. Why marry a guy you KNOW will cheat on you? My past relationships have had good times, but the bad times outweighed the good, and I refuse to put myself through unhappiness, depression, and insecurity again because I don't want to be alone.

I say this, and some people might think that I am crazy: I'D RATHER BE SINGLE AND HAPPY THAN MARRIED AND UNHAPPY.

My mother and I were talking about Nigerian women (and women in general) and their husbands who cheat on them. I asked why they stay. And this is what my mother said:

"You have to think about it like it's a business transaction. What do you have to lose? If you leave him, and you have nothing, why bother? You are better off staying with him and spending his money, while he goes off and does his own thing. If you have your own money, then go ahead and leave him, and do YOUR thing. A lot of the women my [mother's] age didn't have anything when they got married, so they have a lot to lose (financially) if they leave their husbands."

As this beautiful woman was talking, I was praying to God that He should:
1) Make me rich
2) Give me a man who is faithful

Because if He doesn't, e be like say Imma be on my own. Seriously! I remember the heartache I went through in my past relationship, and the thought of it just makes my heart sink. I get really sad, and then I get myself. For staying and taking such rubbish.

But then it was just dating. Marriage is a different story. If the guy is cheating, it is worse because you can't leave. Marriage vows say, "For better or worse...'til death do you part." The Bible says in black and white, "Do not commit adultery" (Ex. 20:14). But if he/she commits adultery, you still have to stay. Ugh! Things just gotta be complicated for no reason.

To cut the long story short, DO NOT CHEAT. I don't know why you gotta have your cake and eat it too. You chose this man/woman to spend the rest of your life with, now do the right thing and be faithful. Easier said than done, right? But with God, all things are possible. Put Him first, and there won't be a problem.

A lot of things can be avoided if God is put first. He will give you someone who is compatible spiritually, financially, emotionally etc. I am not worried about getting married because I trust what He has planned, whether it is to stay single or to be married (1 Cor. 7:1-40 really breaks it down for us).

Sorry if it sounds like I am preaching, but that's the only way I can get the message across.

I pray everyone finds that "person", the one who God has designed SPECIALLY FOR YOU. Because that's all I want. And with constant prayer and walking with God, that's what I'll get.

Good night all.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Where's the Fire...?

I have been meaning to write this post for the longest time, but I have been so busy with school. I have this beautiful 1700-word paper to write about cultural differences and culture shock. Too much information, not enough drive to write. I'm seriously hoping that the paper will write won't? No? *Sigh* I will get back to it soon...UGH!!

Anyway, I digress.

I don't know if it's just me, but over the past few years people have been getting engaged/married at the drop of a hat. Yes, we are at that age...but does that mean we must marry by force?

I know of so many people (and I have heard so many stories) who dated for the usual two and a half years (sometimes more), got engaged, and got married...................................................then divorced two years later. And you wonder where they went wrong. There are women who are surrounded by friends who are engaged, and they feel that they must be next. So they start hinting to their boyfriends that marriage is the next step. The guy feels the pressure, you finally marry, and then three months into it, there are problems. Can I just ask you a question: where is the fire?

Seriously, what is the rush? Just because you are at that age, doesn't mean that is your time.

Don't get me wrong there are some people who have met "the one", and are blessed to spend the rest of their lives with them. But what if you THINK he's "the one"? Are you willing to compromise with some of his faults, some faults that you KNOW on a normal day you can't take?

I am all for marriage, but I am also all for TAKING MY TIME, PRAYER and LEARNING FROM OTHERS. Prayer is definitely the most important thing because if God has not spoken to you and given you some kind of confirmation (whether it's through family or friends), then I don't know what you are doing walking down the aisle with that person.

One thing that I am learning over time is that if I don't look out for myself, who will? I will not sacrifice my happiness just so I can be part of a trend. Why be part of a crowd when you can stand out right? Take your time, there's nothing wrong with that. And also, for my Bible readers, marriage is not for everyone (and the single life is not for everyone either). Know your purpose.

Bear in mind, this is my opinion, so if you disagree, that's what leaving comments is for. Be an adult and just say how you feel.


Monday, April 12, 2010


Last night, I was having a conversation with my boyfriend about tattoos. For those of you who know me, I have one of a dove holding an olive branch in its beak on my left wrist.

(a very blurry picture of my tattoo)

Now, for all my non-Bible readers, this symbolizes peace. I was going through a lot at that time, and I just needed something to look at to remind me that everything will be alright. I've heard that some people regret what they got (or just simply getting a tattoo in the first place). It's been two years since I got this, and each day I love it even more. So much so that I am getting another one THIS SUMMER! :) (they truly are addictive, but I promise that this will be my last one has to be, otherwise my mother...................................enough said.)

This post is just my thoughts on tattoos in general. I love them, when they are done in taste. When there is a story behind them, I have a lot more respect for them.

Now, I am learning not to judge people, but this question has been bugging me for a while: to the ladies, why oh WHY would you want to get some BIG tiger (or eagle, or flower WITH COLOR...those are the worst) on your right or left boob, or a snake winding around your thigh with the head ending at your crotch (yes, people are crazy)?! Or those patterns at the base of your spine (classic tramp stamp)? Or some Chinese (you think it means "love", but it actually means "kill" chile!)? And to the fellas (most men), PLEASE what is sexy in covering your WHOLE body in tattoos??? You look dirty, you look stupid, and it's just NASTY. Now those are the types of tattoos I will definitely regret.

Think before you do...PLEASE...because it hurts more to get it lasered off than it does getting it in the first place. Also, when you get older, you don't want to look at your wrinkly skin and have this ugly thing on you. #justsaying

Friday, April 9, 2010

"I Am Anti-Commitment"

"Love is a bitch. Pain is a whore. Misery is the motherfucker that won’t leave me alone."

Ever see the movie "He's Just Not That Into You" (the book has the same name)? They were definitely not lying when all those excuses meant the same thing: "I'm not into you".

Unfortunately, I fell for it. I really liked this guy, we started off as friends. The communication was not really there, but the sexual chemistry...WOW is all I can say. We became "exclusive", or so I thought. One day, after "talking" for 6 months, I asked him what was going on between us and why after all this time, we were still at the "talking stage". This fool said he's been burnt before, and he doesn't want to get hurt again. He said that he is anti-commitment, and he wants to stay that way. He might as well have just said, "I CLEARLY don't like you enough to be with you".

The sad part is that that should have been the biggest red flag for me to run in the opposite direction. But I stayed. And the longer I stayed, the more I was hurting myself, and the dumber I felt.

Now I knew where he was coming from when he said he's been burnt before, because I have been there. But that doesn't mean you still shouldn't give relationships a chance. We are not the same, and if you have been hurt more than once, then maybe you should take a look at yourself, and find out the kind of people you attract. #justsaying

To anyone reading this, learn from me: Greg Behrendt was not lying. Go and watch the movie, and look at the excuses. Call me naive, but I am a firm believer in if a guy/girl likes you enough to be with you, he/she will make it happen. All those excuses are just a "round about" way of saying "I'm not into you".

Disclaimer: I am definitely not anti-commitment, as you can see from my last post. So all ideas about me being a mad, black woman should quickly be removed. Please and thank you.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

God is Beaming :D

I have been through a lot these past two years. My last relationship lasted a year and a half, and until it ended, I thought he was going to be my husband.

Then it ended, and for the next year of my life, I went through pain and heartache. I thought my world was over, I thought there was no one else out there for me. AND GOD HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME. But then, I thought about that year and a half, and realized that I forced so much of the relationship. I loved him, but it was so fast, and very unhealthy. It started so wrong, we weren't friends first, it was a lot of sexual chemistry, and very little emotional connection and friendship. The pain and heartache were very necessary to move on, otherwise I would be hanging on to something that is no longer there.

For the past year, I have been on several unfulfilling dates. There was always something missing with them. From passion to conversation, it just was not working. I met someone who was a "friend", but with him, he made it so hard to meet other people. I liked him and wanted a relationship, but he was anti-commitment. Where people get that crock of RUBBISH from is beyond me (will save it for another post). I just gave up, and decided to focus more on me, loving me, loving my own company. And it was so much fun.

Then he came along.

When I met him the first time, I thought to myself, "This is not someone I want to be with." But we became friends really quickly. Talking to him is easy, he understands. Yes, we have our disagreements, but we agree to disagree. We talk about everything, from family to where we want to be in 10 years. He's passionate about life, he has dreams, and he's definitely working on making them come true. Like other guys I have dated (which I consider to be a disadvantage), he's well-known. On a normal day, I would not even think twice to saying "hell no".

But clearly this is no normal day. My LIFE is not normal. And I am happy with that.

I am happy. He is part of my happiness. I love being around him, I love talking to him, I love kissing him, I love holding his hands, his words of wisdom just make my day. His drive is inspiring.

One day, I was asking myself how I got so lucky, when my BFF (another wise young woman) said, "it's not that you are lucky. It's that God is smiling on you."

I protested, "So He wasn't smiling on me before?!" And she smiled and said, "He was smiling on you before, but now, He is beaming."

Kodak moment...

That's my mum and me. My dad had a really cool camera that captured so many random moments, and this was one of them. I look exactly like my mum here (except better...hehe). And I have ONE question, and I will let it go FOREVER: Why on Earth am I not yellow like that anymore???? I asked my mum what lotion she used, and she said it was Johnson & Johnson Baby Lotion. I am about to go to the nearest CVS store and buy every bottle.

I need to find all the pictures my dad took, because they are priceless.

I can't stop staring at the picture because it just makes me smile.